Suicidal mode is a harsh, severe emotional state. When a person is suffering, the only thing that is direct and real is the pain. The future is bleak and hazy. As a result, people fail to think in flexible or adaptive ways. Instead, they are frequently inflexible and absolute because of the agony, and the only evident answer appears to be suicide.
If you or someone you know has attempted suicide or if you or someone you know has lost someone to suicide, here are some important lessons to learn:
Suicide Is Not Irrational
Suicides are often perplexing, especially when the victims appear to have had a lot to live for. Getting to know people therapeutically allows you to recognize that suicide is not a strange, irrational act. Rather, it is an act that is carried out for what appears to be good motives at the moment. The key to comprehending how this occurs is to recognize that people’s “self-states” are vastly varied. This is something that almost everyone can relate to, to some extent. Consider a time when you are in a good mood. Consider how you feel when you’re in a bad mood. Depending on one’s attitude, one’s self, the world, and the future all appear to be extremely different.
Ask the difficult question, “Are you suicidal?”
Pay close attention to your guts. If you believe there is an issue, there most likely is. It is critical to pose this challenging question at that point. Yet, I believe we are afraid to ask the question because we are afraid of the answer. What happens if someone you care about says yes? Then it’s true. And it is possible that we will become panicked in this situation, forcing us to instantly begin talking.
You must listen to someone’s reasons for dying in order to help them survive
If we can create a space where someone feels safe talking about part of their grief, the darkness will naturally go to the light. This is something I’m sure you can relate to. Consider a time when you gave yourself permission to talk about some of your problems and then subsequently sat back and said, “Well… I feel better!” Why? Because you let go of that energy, and darkness cannot exist in the light.
The only thing you have control over is yourself
Naturally, we hope that the individual will seek assistance and utilize available services. All we can do, though, is point them in the correct path. We have no influence over whether or not they call for assistance or walk through the doors. All we can do is keep checking in, provide a sympathetic ear, and encourage them to continue speaking. Finally, we must attend to our own emotional needs during this difficult period.
As adults, we must take the initiative
Silence is not an option. Why should the next generation have these painful dialogues about suicide if we as adults can’t? Why would they aid us if we can’t put a voice to our own suffering and cry out for help when we’re in need?
We don’t talk about it enough. The topic of suicide is often considered taboo even in the most advanced, progressive societies. Why? It’s because we are afraid of being labeled as ‘crazy’ or ‘weak.’ But if we learn important lessons from suicide, we can do better and perhaps even save someone’s life.